Idol Survivor: "In This Night"

[halfshellvenus]

In This Night
idol survivor | challenge 1 | ~100 words
Quest For Fire

*~*~*~*~*

Our suspended lives
(gray with the treadmill
sameness of days)
all seek the spark
that will revive us/
transport us/ redeem us/
even set our souls on fire.

We wait to ignite
(and burn or be devoured).

But if that spark should come,
would we then seize it?
Would we breathe life
through its fiery heart,
or let it dwindle
from indifference?

Are we the yin
or the yang?
The death
or the dream?

The volcano
or the sacrificial maiden?

In the dark, we search
for light (for hope)
and we wonder
if this night
will ever end.


--/--

If you enjoyed this poem, you can vote for it along with many other fine entries here.

Comments

[adoptedwriter]

Yeah. Just like Corona Times.

[halfshellvenus]

Isn't it, though? It's so hard not to feel like every day is just a continuation of the same, over and over again. I'm still adjusting to the idea that it's October, and it's nearly over!

[megatronix]

So relatable. It's weird times, isn't it? I like the questions - like well if the opportunity comes, will we take it? I like the imagery of breathing life into a fiery heart too. I always think that looks really cool when people build fires and blow on them to get them going. Nice work.

[halfshellvenus]

In our current state, where every day feels so much like the next and it all seems so unreal, it's hard to know if we would even recognize that opportunity. And if so, could we muster the energy to do something about it? We're so locked into "enduring" and waiting for it to end. :(

[eeyore_grrl]

This line is great, "Are we the yin
or the yang?
The death
or the dream?"

i love the dichotomy of death and dream.

[halfshellvenus]

Thank you so much! That section was the part that really wanted to make this poem happen.

[bsgsix]

Not only is this quality work, but it's also highly relevant and relatable. I *felt* this. "The treadmill sameness of days" is one of the best sentences I have ever read, to be honest. I feel that grey feeling, and that imagery is spot-on.

But in the end, I really like that, in the end, you mention what we're still searching for, despite the never-ending night. It's important to mention that, especially when that is so hard right now.

AMAZING. <3

[halfshellvenus]

I'm so glad you liked that phrasing. That is what life just feels like right now, at least to me. Every morning, the alarm goes off and I wonder what day it is. And even mid-day, when I'm fully awake, I wonder the same thing. It's all work/chores/sleep/chores/work. Is time passing? I no longer think it's still March, but it sure doesn't feel like October.

And yet... I have faith that we'll climb out of this and move forward. I'm just trying to hang on until that happens.

[bsgsix]

I very much agree. We're holding on, we're fighting, we're doing all we can to wake up and get out of this. And we will.

But for now, we're watching and waiting and hanging, and that's never a good feeling. You captured that so well. Not that that surprises me. You are excellent. <3

[gunwithoutmusic]

This was sooo good; I feel like it hits the prompt perfectly, but also kind of sums up the theme that many of us hit on this week. It's good to feel like you're not entirely alone in things. I love the wondering of whether we'll grab the spark or let it pass us by, because it is so easy to just let things slip away, it is so easy to fall victim to the grey... you have to grab it, you have to make the effort, and that's so hard.

[halfshellvenus]

I'm glad you encouraged me to go with this, though I wish it had wanted to 'finish' on Saturday so I didn't spend the weekend working on the other entry!

It's so easy to let things slip away because we get so overwhelmed and bogged down in all of the "musts" and "shoulds," and we can't even point to a time when we know it will be over! Worse right now at our house because my husband is still recuperating from the broken leg, and there's so much more to do around the house. I'm sleeping on the daybed in my office (because he needs the whole bed to himself), and much of the time it feels like I never leave. :O

[bleodswean]

Great visuals, K, and apt analogies! I liked this! It's inspirational!

[halfshellvenus]

Thank you! I'm glad the final feeling is inspirational, rather than just *Sigh* "Yeah." :D

[n3m3sis43]

I couldn't tell if this was specifically about Pandemic Life or about, um... really just everything these days. Either way, it was well-written. Nice work! <3

[halfshellvenus]

Pandemic Life (and its bleed into everything else), and the worsening of it from also having to do all the household stuff while my husband's broken leg heals. I'm trying to keep reaching, keep hoping, while waiting for things (globally and locally) to get better!

[tsuki_no_bara]

this is very adventures in quarantine, but so much more poetic.

[halfshellvenus]

It totally is! Thank you so much. :D

[uselesstinrelic]

My favorite line was

"The volcano
or the sacrificial maiden?"

I'm not sure if you had a preference that we infer from your piece, but I always feel like humans are the volcano :<

There really is such a malaise now. I'm sure you will be able to look back at this piece one day and remember acutely how it felt.

[halfshellvenus]

I think we would like to be the volcano, but at times we feel as pressured and powerless as the maiden. This past year, especially, when we cannot change anything or speed anything along, and most of us are just trying our hardest to endure.

[murielle]

And sometimes I allow the terrible thought in that it never will, but just for an instant.

This is terrific, K. It really hits home. And it's beautifully written. Brava!

[halfshellvenus]

I've never thought about it not ending, but I certainly thought it would have died away by now. But we just refused to be careful enough about it--especially here in the U.S. And that potentially long presymptomatic/asymptomatic period is wreaking such havoc. :(

[flipflop_diva]

Ahhh, poetry!

I feel this one so much though. Just waiting for this to be over and wondering if it will be. I think this sums up perfectly what a lot of people are going through these days. It does for me at least!

[halfshellvenus]

I remember thinking, back in early March when my office closed down, that the wave might pass and we'd be back at work in a few months. Then a few more. And now... it looks as if we're stuck waiting on a vaccine, and I don't know what's going to happen to all of the people who are out of work or will be unable to find work when they graduate. I can't believe we managed to make this worse!

[alycewilson]

I can't remember if I've ever seen you submit a poem before, but I like it! The idea of gray, suspended lives where you can't tell what's what is such a perfect metaphor for what so many of us are experiencing.

[halfshellvenus]

I don't do poetry very often, but this was a poem that wanted to be written!

Everything has been "on hold" for so long that it's hard to tell whether time is even passing. It wasn't until mid-summer that I stopped feeling as if it was still March. And a few weeks ago, I wondered why people were bringing up Halloween decorations in the middle of June!

It would be different if we knew there was an end in sight, and about how far in the future it might be. But we don't. This feels so much like many a situational-depression episode, where you're just trying to endure until it's over, and not fully living your life in the meantime. :(